I just wanted to give everyone an update (sort of) without going into details because it seems our "going dark" has concerned some of our family and friends....
We're still doing ok throughout our Operation Jellyman Kelly process.
We have no news to share right now but please know that we're extremely thankful for all the loving prayers and thoughts you've continued sending our way.
It's a very emotional time for us and we're so grateful to have each and every one of you in our lives.
We're also very grateful that you've all respected our wishes in not asking us for any "news".
Thank you again and we'll talk soon.
Friday, September 30, 2011
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Paddlefest, Funeral and a Wedding reception
This Saturday could very well have been our busiest Saturday in some time.
It started with a short road trip to Lake Anna for the first annual Paddlefest 2011. Awesome idea for an awesome community of paddlers....it was a small event hosted by a family that owns a beautiful piece of property at Lake Anna. There were kayak and SUP "drag" races, water olympics and slolam courses. Those in attendance were such a joy to talk to. Almost everybody was in complete awe of Kozy SUPing with Jody. And on more than one occasion someone mentioned how adorable it was that Kozy and Jody had matching lifevests. ; )
We were a hit at the event (when I say we, I mean Kozy) and have been told we (again, Kozy) MUST be back for the second annual Paddlefest.
After Paddlefest we road tripped it back home, showered and changed and attended a funeral service for a friends mother.
When we arrived at the church where the service was being held, I noticed a bubble machine at the front door. While I'd never met our friends mother, the bubble machine immediately told me I'd have liked her.
The service was beautiful....a true testament to the kind of woman whose life was being celebrated.
Our friends sister stood at the podium and delivered a heart-felt eulogy. In no way can I do it justice, but she spoke of how she looked up to her mother, how her mother was the most courageous person she'd ever known, how she knew exactly what her children were thinking at all times, knew exactly what they needed at all times. She shared the story of her mothers passing....it was during the aftermath of Hurricane Irene...and how she prayed to God to clear the path so she could get to her mothers house in the storm-riddled roads. She spoke of how every tree that had fallen in her path had been removed....and as she turned onto the last road before the house....she saw an angel...drenched in sweat...removing the last remaining tree in her path with a chainsaw. That angel was her brother. Our friend.
Though we sat in the back of the church for the service, we could see our dear friend at the front. When his sister spoke of him being there, removing that last tree in their way....we could see it affected him.
My heart ached so, so much for him in that moment.
When it was time for our friend to speak....he could not. I don't know how it was possible...but I felt every single person in the church collectively pray or wish for him the courage to say what he needed to say.
It broke my heart to see our strong, loving friend...in so much pain.
The service continued and the pastor shared the story of the bubble machine I'd seen at the door. He said our friends mother wanted to plan out her service so that her family didn't have to. And she asked the pastor if he thought the church would allow bubbles at the service. She loved bubbles. And so there were bubbles.
After this, our friend was able to get up and speak.
He thanked everyone that had been a part of his mothers life. He shared how much he loved her. It was gut-wrenching at times.
He closed with what I thought to be the most perfect thing ever....
He said if we were lucky enough to still have our mothers around, to call them and tell them how much you love them. They deserve it.
After the service we were able to throw our arms around our friends. Something I'd wanted to do the moment the service started.
We left the church feeling very thankful for friends that love so, so deeply.
And on the drive home, I called my Mom and told her I loved her.
And then it was time to change gears for a different kind of event....a wedding reception for a wonderful couple we've known only a little while but have already grown to love.
We stopped at Pier 1 to purchase a wedding gift and got into the most ridiculous (and I must say, fun) argument in the store over what to get them.
I suggested this really cool looking glass head that was made in Spain....it was quirky and I thought perfect for the couple we were shopping for.
Jody suggested a metal skiing dog....because if anything said "unique", it was a metal skiing dog.
We kept arguing over where we thought the couple would be able to put a glass head vs metal skiing dog and eventually Jody consulted one of the associates to settle our argument.
"We're going to a wedding, the couples style is unique, we've narrowed it down to either a glass head or a metal skiing dog. What would you like better?"
I have to say....I've never seen a Pier 1 associate look so baffled. It was hilarious.
"Um.....well....I like them both....but if you want to be able to put the gift in a box, we don't have one big enough for the metal dog."
SUCCESS! LOL!!!!
The wedding reception was a blast. We ate, drank, joked around with friends and just genuinely enjoyed the night. The bride and groom looked absolutely amazing.
And today, that lucky couple should be opening up a beautifully wrapped box with a......head inside.....
wait...is that creepy????????
It started with a short road trip to Lake Anna for the first annual Paddlefest 2011. Awesome idea for an awesome community of paddlers....it was a small event hosted by a family that owns a beautiful piece of property at Lake Anna. There were kayak and SUP "drag" races, water olympics and slolam courses. Those in attendance were such a joy to talk to. Almost everybody was in complete awe of Kozy SUPing with Jody. And on more than one occasion someone mentioned how adorable it was that Kozy and Jody had matching lifevests. ; )
We were a hit at the event (when I say we, I mean Kozy) and have been told we (again, Kozy) MUST be back for the second annual Paddlefest.
After Paddlefest we road tripped it back home, showered and changed and attended a funeral service for a friends mother.
When we arrived at the church where the service was being held, I noticed a bubble machine at the front door. While I'd never met our friends mother, the bubble machine immediately told me I'd have liked her.
The service was beautiful....a true testament to the kind of woman whose life was being celebrated.
Our friends sister stood at the podium and delivered a heart-felt eulogy. In no way can I do it justice, but she spoke of how she looked up to her mother, how her mother was the most courageous person she'd ever known, how she knew exactly what her children were thinking at all times, knew exactly what they needed at all times. She shared the story of her mothers passing....it was during the aftermath of Hurricane Irene...and how she prayed to God to clear the path so she could get to her mothers house in the storm-riddled roads. She spoke of how every tree that had fallen in her path had been removed....and as she turned onto the last road before the house....she saw an angel...drenched in sweat...removing the last remaining tree in her path with a chainsaw. That angel was her brother. Our friend.
Though we sat in the back of the church for the service, we could see our dear friend at the front. When his sister spoke of him being there, removing that last tree in their way....we could see it affected him.
My heart ached so, so much for him in that moment.
When it was time for our friend to speak....he could not. I don't know how it was possible...but I felt every single person in the church collectively pray or wish for him the courage to say what he needed to say.
It broke my heart to see our strong, loving friend...in so much pain.
The service continued and the pastor shared the story of the bubble machine I'd seen at the door. He said our friends mother wanted to plan out her service so that her family didn't have to. And she asked the pastor if he thought the church would allow bubbles at the service. She loved bubbles. And so there were bubbles.
After this, our friend was able to get up and speak.
He thanked everyone that had been a part of his mothers life. He shared how much he loved her. It was gut-wrenching at times.
He closed with what I thought to be the most perfect thing ever....
He said if we were lucky enough to still have our mothers around, to call them and tell them how much you love them. They deserve it.
After the service we were able to throw our arms around our friends. Something I'd wanted to do the moment the service started.
We left the church feeling very thankful for friends that love so, so deeply.
And on the drive home, I called my Mom and told her I loved her.
And then it was time to change gears for a different kind of event....a wedding reception for a wonderful couple we've known only a little while but have already grown to love.
We stopped at Pier 1 to purchase a wedding gift and got into the most ridiculous (and I must say, fun) argument in the store over what to get them.
I suggested this really cool looking glass head that was made in Spain....it was quirky and I thought perfect for the couple we were shopping for.
Jody suggested a metal skiing dog....because if anything said "unique", it was a metal skiing dog.
We kept arguing over where we thought the couple would be able to put a glass head vs metal skiing dog and eventually Jody consulted one of the associates to settle our argument.
"We're going to a wedding, the couples style is unique, we've narrowed it down to either a glass head or a metal skiing dog. What would you like better?"
I have to say....I've never seen a Pier 1 associate look so baffled. It was hilarious.
"Um.....well....I like them both....but if you want to be able to put the gift in a box, we don't have one big enough for the metal dog."
SUCCESS! LOL!!!!
The wedding reception was a blast. We ate, drank, joked around with friends and just genuinely enjoyed the night. The bride and groom looked absolutely amazing.
And today, that lucky couple should be opening up a beautifully wrapped box with a......head inside.....
wait...is that creepy????????
Friday, September 9, 2011
Operation Jellyman Kelly: To be continued...
DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person after reading this....stop reading now. ; )
If you keep up with this blog (or me for that matter), you know I'm extremely open about our infertility journey.
I will talk about it night and day if it helps spread awareness and makes someone more mindful of how they speak to people affected by infertility.....but alas....I'm part of a team....and the other half of this team is not as open as I am.
So....from this point out....Operation Jellyman Kelly is going radio silent until we have some good, bad or inbetween news to share.
I understand it's extremely selfish to keep you so informed and then disappear like this....but it's the only way to allow ourselves just a little bit of privacy for a typically pivate matter.
I know you all understand...because we surround ourselves with the best of people.
Please know that when we're ready to share.....we absolutely will.
We love you all so so much and thank you in advance for your understanding.
To be continued...............
If you keep up with this blog (or me for that matter), you know I'm extremely open about our infertility journey.
I will talk about it night and day if it helps spread awareness and makes someone more mindful of how they speak to people affected by infertility.....but alas....I'm part of a team....and the other half of this team is not as open as I am.
So....from this point out....Operation Jellyman Kelly is going radio silent until we have some good, bad or inbetween news to share.
I understand it's extremely selfish to keep you so informed and then disappear like this....but it's the only way to allow ourselves just a little bit of privacy for a typically pivate matter.
I know you all understand...because we surround ourselves with the best of people.
Please know that when we're ready to share.....we absolutely will.
We love you all so so much and thank you in advance for your understanding.
To be continued...............
Operation Jellyman Kelly: Egg retrieval
DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person after reading this....stop reading now. ; )
Nine eggs.
Dr. T was able to retrieve nine eggs, which I don't mind telling you, really disappointed me.
He'd led me to believe I had between 10 and 20 follicles...but when it came down to it....9 is what we got.
I won't lie.....I was hoping for more because I felt more would give us better odds of fertilization (even though I know that's not true). And it's not Dr. T's fault.....he thought he saw what he thought he saw. But for some reason I'm still disappointed. My belly was SO full and uncomfortable......I just truly felt there were...more.
Number of eggs aside, I'm happy to report the experience itself was absolutely amazing.
I didn't know what to expect when we arrived at the IVF Center, I just knew I was starving and uncomfortably full of follicles and walked in like a woman trying to shoplift a watermelon between her legs.
We were immediately greeted by the receptionist who exclaimed she felt she knew us because of all the paperwork and insurance claims she'd filed on our behalf.
We waited approximately 1 minute before a nurse opened the door and greeted us with the biggest of smiles, immediately comforting me.
Once we reached the door she introduced herself (Sandy) and grabbed my hand and started telling me how much they were looking forward to having us and if I needed anything to let her know.
As we walked back to the room we'd be based in Sandy introduced us to other nurses along the way and swung my hand up and down like she was showing off a new best friend.
She was a blessing to me at that very moment.
When we got to the room we could see they took great care in making sure both husband and wife would be comfortable. I would spend the entire time in the comfy hospital bed and my husband would get to lounge in the lazy boy (complete with massage features).
Once we were settled in the room Sandy walked us both through the process and time-line of our visit while collecting vital signs and medical history.
And then we met Frank the anesthesiologist and he got my IV started.
Sandy and Frank have apparently been working together for 15 years or so and it showed. Their playfullness was key to my relaxation.
Sandy warned my husband that most patients try to take Frank home with them at the end of the day because he's adorable...and he's got the goods (the drugs that is).
In fact, Frank did tell me while he started my IV that if he starts getting better looking then he's given me too much! LOL!
Frank gave me a little something as a "test" to see how I'd react to the drugs and the next thing I knew...they were rolling me into the operating room.
Frank said that I'd still be awake while they attached the EKG, etc. but that I would be asleep soon after that...
but I don't remember them hooking up the EKG.
I'm such a lightweight.
I woke to Sandy's voice asking how I was feeling.
According to Sandy and my husband, I said I was feeling fine and continuously asked if we played bumper cars with the hospital beds. I must have asked that because the last time I was in a hospital bed (for my laparoscopy) I vividly remember the nurses bumping my bed into the wall and a shelf just before going under for my surgery.
I remember Dr. T coming into the room and telling us they got 9 eggs.
And then according to Sandy and my husband I asked if my stomach ate some of the follicles during the retrieval because I was so hungry.
I wasn't in too much pain thanks to Frank and a wonderful heating pad and had the best nap ever tucked securely into my hospital bed.
Before I knew it, I was getting dressed and being wheeled out to the car.
I slept the rest of the day.
Today I feel much more bloated and have limited mobility...I don't know how some women are able to go to work the day after a retrieval!
Anyhow, we're halfway there.
Thanks for all your continued well wishes and good thoughts!!!!!
Nine eggs.
Dr. T was able to retrieve nine eggs, which I don't mind telling you, really disappointed me.
He'd led me to believe I had between 10 and 20 follicles...but when it came down to it....9 is what we got.
I won't lie.....I was hoping for more because I felt more would give us better odds of fertilization (even though I know that's not true). And it's not Dr. T's fault.....he thought he saw what he thought he saw. But for some reason I'm still disappointed. My belly was SO full and uncomfortable......I just truly felt there were...more.
Number of eggs aside, I'm happy to report the experience itself was absolutely amazing.
I didn't know what to expect when we arrived at the IVF Center, I just knew I was starving and uncomfortably full of follicles and walked in like a woman trying to shoplift a watermelon between her legs.
We were immediately greeted by the receptionist who exclaimed she felt she knew us because of all the paperwork and insurance claims she'd filed on our behalf.
We waited approximately 1 minute before a nurse opened the door and greeted us with the biggest of smiles, immediately comforting me.
Once we reached the door she introduced herself (Sandy) and grabbed my hand and started telling me how much they were looking forward to having us and if I needed anything to let her know.
As we walked back to the room we'd be based in Sandy introduced us to other nurses along the way and swung my hand up and down like she was showing off a new best friend.
She was a blessing to me at that very moment.
When we got to the room we could see they took great care in making sure both husband and wife would be comfortable. I would spend the entire time in the comfy hospital bed and my husband would get to lounge in the lazy boy (complete with massage features).
Once we were settled in the room Sandy walked us both through the process and time-line of our visit while collecting vital signs and medical history.
And then we met Frank the anesthesiologist and he got my IV started.
Sandy and Frank have apparently been working together for 15 years or so and it showed. Their playfullness was key to my relaxation.
Sandy warned my husband that most patients try to take Frank home with them at the end of the day because he's adorable...and he's got the goods (the drugs that is).
In fact, Frank did tell me while he started my IV that if he starts getting better looking then he's given me too much! LOL!
Frank gave me a little something as a "test" to see how I'd react to the drugs and the next thing I knew...they were rolling me into the operating room.
Frank said that I'd still be awake while they attached the EKG, etc. but that I would be asleep soon after that...
but I don't remember them hooking up the EKG.
I'm such a lightweight.
I woke to Sandy's voice asking how I was feeling.
According to Sandy and my husband, I said I was feeling fine and continuously asked if we played bumper cars with the hospital beds. I must have asked that because the last time I was in a hospital bed (for my laparoscopy) I vividly remember the nurses bumping my bed into the wall and a shelf just before going under for my surgery.
I remember Dr. T coming into the room and telling us they got 9 eggs.
And then according to Sandy and my husband I asked if my stomach ate some of the follicles during the retrieval because I was so hungry.
I wasn't in too much pain thanks to Frank and a wonderful heating pad and had the best nap ever tucked securely into my hospital bed.
Before I knew it, I was getting dressed and being wheeled out to the car.
I slept the rest of the day.
Today I feel much more bloated and have limited mobility...I don't know how some women are able to go to work the day after a retrieval!
Anyhow, we're halfway there.
Thanks for all your continued well wishes and good thoughts!!!!!
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Operation Jellyman Kelly: X marks the spot
DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person after reading this....stop reading now. ; )
We're triggered!
During yesterday's appointment I had one of the nurses draw an X where I needed to get my trigger shot.
My husband did a fantastic job of hitting exactly where he needed to with as little pain for me as possible. (I know he hit exactly where he needed to because of the one drop of blood that collected after the shot). ; )
While the shot was relatively painless....it was still pretty scary seeing my husband go from handling a Lupron needle (shown below on left) to handling a 23 gauge (shown below on right)...
And while the trigger shot was what I was most worried about...it turned out the last Lupron shot had it in for me.....
I noticed the shot stung a bit more than usual and didn't think anything of it....
until a small bruise started forming....
and then that bruise turned black today (which apparently happens to plenty of women so it's not a concern, just a pain).
Ah IVF......thou art thou heartless bitch. ; )
So I hope to be alert and well enough to update everyone tomorrow after egg retrieval...but lets be honest...I'll be drugged....so you may not get an update for a few days. ; )
Until then my friends!
We're triggered!
During yesterday's appointment I had one of the nurses draw an X where I needed to get my trigger shot.
My husband did a fantastic job of hitting exactly where he needed to with as little pain for me as possible. (I know he hit exactly where he needed to because of the one drop of blood that collected after the shot). ; )
While the shot was relatively painless....it was still pretty scary seeing my husband go from handling a Lupron needle (shown below on left) to handling a 23 gauge (shown below on right)...
And while the trigger shot was what I was most worried about...it turned out the last Lupron shot had it in for me.....
I noticed the shot stung a bit more than usual and didn't think anything of it....
until a small bruise started forming....
and then that bruise turned black today (which apparently happens to plenty of women so it's not a concern, just a pain).
Ah IVF......thou art thou heartless bitch. ; )
So I hope to be alert and well enough to update everyone tomorrow after egg retrieval...but lets be honest...I'll be drugged....so you may not get an update for a few days. ; )
Until then my friends!
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Operation Jellyman Kelly: All Clear
DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person after reading this....stop reading now. ; )
Appointment this morning went well!
Dr. T said my follicles were plentiful and ready.
We are a GO for Thursday egg retrieval.
I do one more Lupron injection tonight as well as the dreaded trigger shot (the long needle).
And then....I'm DONE with injections for this cycle!
More to follow.............
Appointment this morning went well!
Dr. T said my follicles were plentiful and ready.
We are a GO for Thursday egg retrieval.
I do one more Lupron injection tonight as well as the dreaded trigger shot (the long needle).
And then....I'm DONE with injections for this cycle!
More to follow.............
Monday, September 5, 2011
Operation Jellyman Kelly: Shots, shots and more shots
DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no
doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current
treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or
don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person
after reading this....stop reading now. ; )
I'm happy to report Friday's appointment went well!
Dr. T measured 6 "good-looking" follicles and said there were more but only measured the biggest of them.
This was a huge relief as I was very concerned my body wouldn't cooperate with all of these drugs.
The night of the appointment we started our third injection (Menopur)...so we're up to three injections a night now.
Lupron, Gonal-F and Menopur.
I must admit....3 shots a night....not.......fun.
Of all the shots, the Menopur actually hurts the most. Not sure if it's because there's so much of it that needs to be injected....but man it burns going in.
Last night we had our first mess-up with the shots and put too much sodium chloride into the Menopur powder. It doesn't affect anything except it made MORE liquid to inject which meant twice as much burning/stinging. =( Not pleasant.....but we got through it.
Tomorrow I have another appointment to make sure everything looks good and I'll find out if we're a go for Thursday egg retrieval.
Wish me luck some more! ; )
I'm happy to report Friday's appointment went well!
Dr. T measured 6 "good-looking" follicles and said there were more but only measured the biggest of them.
This was a huge relief as I was very concerned my body wouldn't cooperate with all of these drugs.
The night of the appointment we started our third injection (Menopur)...so we're up to three injections a night now.
Lupron, Gonal-F and Menopur.
I must admit....3 shots a night....not.......fun.
Of all the shots, the Menopur actually hurts the most. Not sure if it's because there's so much of it that needs to be injected....but man it burns going in.
Last night we had our first mess-up with the shots and put too much sodium chloride into the Menopur powder. It doesn't affect anything except it made MORE liquid to inject which meant twice as much burning/stinging. =( Not pleasant.....but we got through it.
Tomorrow I have another appointment to make sure everything looks good and I'll find out if we're a go for Thursday egg retrieval.
Wish me luck some more! ; )
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Operation Jellyman Kelly: Moving along
DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no
doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current
treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or
don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person
after reading this....stop reading now. ; )
It’s official.
I’ve gained weight in all the wrong places and have now been
forced to purchase bigger pants.
It was actually pretty depressing…making that purchase.
Now….if this all pays off and we end up pregnant…I will be
only too thrilled to purchase maternity clothes….but right now….it’s just not
fun.
We’re up to two injections a night and it’s not getting
easier. =( The shots hurt a LOT more at this point…probably
because we keep injecting in the same areas every other day.
I’m also feeling much, MUCH more tired and have a lot of
headaches….but that could be because I also quit caffeine cold turkey to try to
prep my body for better things to come.
I’ve been emotionally unstable for a little while now but am
happy to report I can hold
it together in front of others.
We had a group of friends over last night for a
post-hurricane meat dinner (we had a lot of meat that needed to be cooked and
there was no way the two of us could eat that much meat). It was soooo wonderful being out of bed after
9 p.m.! Usually after I get my
injections at 6 I am down for the count, feeling gross, feeling a little pain,
etc. I end up laying on the bed either
reading or watching a movie and I’m asleep by 9. So this dinner party was a welcome distraction. I was still in a little pain, but
surprisingly…..lots of laughter made the pain subside.
Something else happened last night that’s worth mentioning...
My husband was talking about the injections and having to
transport the medications during the hurricane, etc. with our friends.
He HATES talking about our situation….so hearing him
casually mention having to be home at 6 p.m. every night to administer my
injections was pretty mind-boggling and made me very happy that he felt
comfortable enough to talk about it. I’m
sure it helped that our dear friends that also went through IVF were there and had
war stories to share of their own!
It was a wonderful impromptu kind of night and I was so
happy to spend it with friends.
So…in addition to feeling fairly yucky a good 90% of the day….I’m
also starting to get excited and a little freaked out as we get closer to egg
retrieval.
I have no idea if this massive dosage of infertility meds
has coerced my body into actually producing a satisfactory amount of follicles…we’ll
find out tomorrow at my appointment how things are looking.
I’m thrilled and terrified at the same time…because if Dr. T
doesn’t see many follicles….well then there’s a chance they won’t successfully
retrieve any eggs and the IVF cycle will be over.
So….cross your fingers for me tomorrow!
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