Monday, March 28, 2011

Catch-Up...

Happy Monday all!

My apologies for not keeping my blog as up to date as possible.

So, when we last left off I was telling you about my complete disgust with myself and that our baby Kea isn't doing well, etc.

I'm happy to write that Kea is doing better.  Not much better, but better nonetheless.

She's eating a bit more and moving around more.

We're hoping she continues to feel better and more like herself.

As far as my being grossed out by my own body...that hasn't really changed since my last post.  I'm still not happy with myself...however...I have been a bit more active and am already starting to feel better.

In other news....my husband and a friend and I got to see Kodo perform in Richmond on St. Patricks Day and it was AMAZING.

This was the second time we've seen them in concert and it was even better than before.

Their stage presence and unbelievable energy immediately shoots out into the audience and you just feel so...in rhythm with life.  It was an outstanding performance and I hope they come back to Richmond soon.

We haven't been up to much else apart from work and a little SUPing in between so I'm afraid that's all I have to write about at the moment.

More to follow......

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Baby Kea

Our female boxer (Kea) is 11 years old now.



















She was diagnosed with Cushings Disease about a year after our baby Gridgery died (Kea pictured above at Gridery's spot at Poor Farm Park).

She's been on a steady dose of medications since her diagnosis but she seems to have taken a turn for the worst in the past several weeks.

She's lost so much weight and can't hold herself up for very long. 

She walks into walls.

She falls down stairs.

She walks in circles.

It's breaking our heart to see her like this.

The vet thinks it's a tumor in the pituitary gland and that it's probably the reason she's walking into walls and walking in circles.

She falls a lot.

We're feeding her more good food than she's ever had and she still doesn't gain any of her weight back.

I hate this...

but I think we're losing her.

I'm praying that the vet will find something new and hopeful in her recent test results that we can try.

I can't stand seeing Kea so out of sorts.  So.....lost.

Operation Jellyman Kelly: Another Fail

DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person after reading this....stop reading now. ; )

Once again, I didn't even make it to the official "test" date.

My period started this morning.

Strike 2.

This is starting to piss me off.

The fact that it's not working is one thing, but being scared to do any kind of physical activity is another.

I'm constantly freaking myself out over stupid things and I'm sick of it.

My husband and I are participating in a 10k next month.  He's been running every week, I haven't run or even jogged yet.

He works out, he goes paddleboarding, I don't.

My fear of doing something that would hurt our chances of the IUI working has made me fat and lazy.

I've gained 15 pounds since we started our first IUI cycle.

15!

I'm in the worst shape of my life and I'm disgusted with myself.

So I think we're going to take a break this cycle.

I want to go for a jog.  I want to go for a paddle.  Maybe a bike ride.  Something healthy, something active, without fear that I'm doing something to hurt our chances of conceiving.

We'll see about doing our 3rd IUI next month (after the 10k).

Until then...Operation Jellyman Kelly is officially on hold.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Operation Jellyman Kelly: Try, Try Again

DISCLAIMER: Any blog posts titled "Operation Jellyman Kelly" will no doubt gross you out. These posts will describe our current treatments for infertility...so if you have a weak stomach or don't know how you'd have a conversation with me in person after reading this....stop reading now. ; )

My apologies for not keeping the blog updated.

After the big FAIL of our first IUI cycle I just wasn't up for sharing that much.

I'm over it.  ; )

So when your cycle fails, you have to go in for 3rd day labs which consists of an ultrasound and bloodwork.

Dr. T found a cyst on my left ovary during the ultrasound but it was small enough that he wasn't concerned and the bloodwork apparently came back ok.

Thankfully, that meant we could go directly into another IUI cycle.

Well, I say thankfully because I just didn't want to feel like we were wasting a cycle...but my husband may have other opinions on the matter (he's the one that has to deal with my over-hormonal madness).

So I was back on the drugs, back on the injections and back on the table with bottoms off and legs up.

The actual IUI procedures felt much better this time.

I didn't cramp us as much as I had the first time and the discomfort and pressure in my abdomen didn't last nearly as long.

Today I had my second dose of the HCG shot so now we enter the 2 week wait....again.

Our thought is just to get through 3 cycles of IUI so we can move on to IVF. 

I'm done fantasizing about the IUI's working.

I know that sounds extremely negative, but it helps me deal with the fact that my life is currently broken up into 2 week increments.

Blah!

Sidenote: I really appreciate Dr.'s offices that hang art on the ceiling.

When you spend so much time lying down and looking up...it's very comforting.

This was the view from table in room #1:


















And this was the view from table in room #2:


















Sidenote #2: One of Dr. T's nurses likes to call patients from the waiting room like they've been chosen for a game show...."Mrs. D----come ON BACK!" 

I appreciate that.  ; )